


do it for yesterday

by governessattending (syballineInferno)



Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Dyslexia, Families of Choice, Gen, adopted family, alcohol tw maybe?, don't look at me, dyslexic! cynthia, ferp, no caps because stylization, our lq has adopted me basically, rp fic, trash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-05
Updated: 2014-07-05
Packaged: 2018-02-07 13:34:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1900851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/syballineInferno/pseuds/governessattending
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>now cinderella don’t you go to sleep, it’s such a bitter form of refuge. / but the world is ending and there would never be a child that’s biologically his, and he thinks the fact that the latter is the one he finds more distressing means his priorities are all wrong. </p>
<p>or, lon’qu and cynthia adopt each other, sort of. a story in three parts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	do it for yesterday

**Author's Note:**

> first off, im trash.  
> rp ficcc. also dyslexic cynthia, and headcanon. and stuff. and also i listened to a dustland fairytale over a dozen times. i should've been writing nano and instead i wrote 1k of rp fic that i am crossposting. fascinating.

**i. saw the devil wrapping up his hands [he’s getting ready for the showdown]**

there’s a discrepancy in her face — in all of the children’s faces, really — that sets him on edge.  every one of them are so young, youthful faces and young features, cherry lipped, but naga almighty their eyes were far too old for their ages, ancient and tired, and in the quiet moments where they’re idle for moments you can see it flicker. physically they’re all younger than him. mentally, he isn’t sure he agrees. 

he meets cynthia well and truly after he befriends her mother. anyone who sees her can tell you her parents, the shock of ginger hair the same shade as gaius’ and her mother’s klutziness and smile. there’s something bright and  _glowing_ about her that is close to irreplaceable, like sunshine after rain. 

but here’s another thing about the children from the future; every time he sees one of the future children, he’s reminded quickly that none of them are his. he loves henry with all his heart, would walk through hell for him and henry’s healed part of them he never thought he’d fix again, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t hard. not when everywhere he turned he was reminded again. 

he talks to her anyway. she has a way of making people happy in dire times, bright and loud and shimmery, and he wonders if she is one of the exceptions to the rule that the future kids are far past their ages. lon’qu thinks he needs a little more sunshine in his life, but really, who didn’t? the world was ending.

he sees her reading alone, moments of peace spread out over an hour. she’s pulling on her bright, bright locks and she hasn’t flipped a page in a half an hour. 

when he asks her if she has trouble reading, he sees it. 

cynthia is a proud girl, unlike sumia in that way, but he sees her deflate and the youth seems to ebb from her eyes. he’s quickly reminded that she was still a little girl, trying to save the world. shimmery, but not all that glitters is gold and just because a stone shines doesn’t mean its a diamond.

"yes," she says, her hands shaking with white knuckles around the book. her face is red and there’s a stutter in her voice, like she was going to cry. "yes."

he rubs her hand quietly, and wonders if he would’ve been a good father.

**ii. is there still magic in the midnight sun? [or did you leave it back in ‘61]**

gaius is off doing some mission for chrom, leaves by kissing sumia and ruffling cynthia’s hair, winks at chrom and robin and goes,  _alright, blue._

he’s gone for three weeks, and every day lon’qu sits with cynthia. sometimes she tries to read and they’re quiet, sometimes they spar and sometimes he lets her speak and answers only when she pauses. it isn’t until she almost calls him  _papa_ , lets the word half slide out of her mouth before trying to shove it back in, that he feels  _wrong._

lon’qu will probably never have children. he shouldn’t have been trying to adopt gaius’ while he was gone and naga he accepts he’s wrong but he won’t stop keeping her company. 

gaius’ mission is taking longer than they thought. he stops seeking her out. she comes and finds him. not only in the mornings but at meals, when sumia was talking to some others and lon’qu is by himself because henry is working on something or talking to tharja [no, thank you]. she talks fast and her hair bounces, and he can’t force him to get rid of her. 

he wonders if gaius would hate him for trying to take his place.

[he watches her interact, bring smiles to peoples’ faces, watches gerome’s cheeks burn red as they speak but only mentions it to cynthia once. she could’ve been a princess. benevolent. kind.]

he thinks that he could’ve been her father in another life, maybe. he’s never been one for what ifs but gods almighty, he’ll make an exception for her. he always will.

**iii. saw cinderella in her party dress [but she was looking for a nightgown]**

grima is gone for another thousand years or so. robin was ready to die, lon’qu could see it in their eyes, but chrom was faster. closer.

[everyone was ready to die for this cause, for each other — he can see it in the set of their faces and the way they spoke before the last battle, laughing like a dying man would.] 

lon’qu kisses henry senseless, presses a ring into his hand and goes,  _marry me_  and then they separate for the rest of the night, drinking and laughing. 

lon’qu views these people as family, but he needed some quiet, so at some point between one and two am he disappears outside the tavern for a few minutes. just a breather. he smells like alcohol and he hasn’t had any, but maribelle had definitely gotten some on him, drinking and grinning, her poise out the door in deliriousness. he can forgive it; she nearly saw her son die today. 

"lon’qu?" cynthia asks, a soft slur to her words. he’d seen her drinking earlier, had moved to stop her [naga, she was so smart but a drinking contest with kjelle wasn’t her best move] but gaius beat him to it and he reminded himself he wasn’t her father.

"yes?" he steadies her, a hand on her shoulder as she leans against the tavern next to him. her hair is down and she’s in a dress severa picked out for her. 

"can i still visit you?" she asks, big eyes blinking at him. "i don’t want to visit my parents after this timeline me is born, at least not frequently, no matter what they say, i don’t want to do that to her. me, i guess. i’ll write them. and i’m going to be in wyvern valley, err, with gerome," even tipsy she blushes. "and there’s no kid for me to timeline confuse with you and henry and —"

cynthia pauses. lon’qu had never been good with emotions and had been worse with expressing them, but he hopes he can convey them properly.

"i," he says earnestly. "would be very upset if you didn’t." 

cynthia beams at him.

she’s not his daughter, no. and he might never have children himself. but gods be damned if she wasn’t his daughter in all but blood.


End file.
